Jeff Dean：（也稱Jeffrey Adgate Dean）是一名美國計算機科學家和軟體工程師，出生于1968年，畢業于華盛頓大學，主要作品有《MapReduce》等，
主要成就：
- MapReduce 一個大規模資料處理系統
- BigTable 一個結構化資料的分布式存盤系統
- Spanner 一個全球性的資料庫系統
- 參與谷歌的網路爬蟲、索引、查詢系統、AdSense、谷歌翻譯的設計與實作，
- 2009年當選美國工程院院士
- TensorFlow 人工智能學習系統 專案負責人
Jeffrey Dean，簡單來說，這貨是Google牛逼的源泉之一，因為此人實在太牛了，于是出現了關于他有多牛的幾個笑話，直接笑翻，和大家共享下，
- During his own Google interview, Jeff Dean was asked the implications if P=NP were true. He said, "P = 0 or N = 1." Then, before the interviewer had even finished laughing, Jeff examined Google’s public certificate and wrote the private key on the whiteboard.
當他被Google面試時，Jeff Dean被問及如果P=NP意味著什么，他說，“P=0 或者 N=1”，然后，在所有的面試官還沒笑完之前，Jeff瞄了一眼Google的公共證書然后在白板上寫上了對應的私鑰，
- Compilers don’t warn Jeff Dean. Jeff Dean warns compilers.
編譯器從來不給Jeff編譯警告，而是Jeff警告編譯器
- The rate at which Jeff Dean produces code jumped by a factor of 40 in late 2000 when he upgraded his keyboard to USB 2.0.
在2000年后段，Jeff碼代碼的速度突然激增了40倍，原因是他把自己的鍵盤升級到了USB 2.0
- Jeff Dean builds his code before committing it, but only to check for compiler and linker bugs.
Jeff還是會在提交代碼前把它們編譯一遍，不過這么做的目的只是為了檢查下編譯器和聯結器有沒有bug
- All pointers point to Jeff Dean.
所有指標都是指向Jeff的
- gcc -O4 emails your code to Jeff Dean for a rewrite.
gcc的-O4優化選項是將你的代碼郵件給Jeff重寫一下
- The speed of light in a vacuum used to be about 35 mph. Then Jeff Dean spent a weekend optimizing physics.
光在真空中的速度曾近是35英里每小時，后來Jeff花了一個周末對物理學進行了小小的優化
- Jeff Dean was born on December 31, 1969 at 11:48 PM. It took him twelve minutes to implement his first time counter.
Jeff出生于1969年12月31日的下午11點48分，然后他花了整整12分鐘的時間實作了他的第一個計時器，（背景：計算機中的計時器數值通常被設計為從1970年1月1日0點0分0秒到當前為止的秒數）
- When Jeff Dean sends an ethernet frame there are no collisions because the competing frames retreat back up into the buffer memory on their source nic.
當Jeff向以太網發送一個資料包時從來不會有沖突，原因是本來要和它有沖突的包都默默撤回了緩沖區
- Unsatisfied with constant time, Jeff Dean created the world's first O(1/n)algorithm.
Jeff對常量的時間復雜度并不滿足，于是他創造了世界上第一個O(1/n)的演算法，（即隨著問題規模的增大，其解決問題所花的時間會越短）
- Jeff Dean was forced to invent asynchronous APIs one day when he optimized a function so that it returned before it was invoked.
Jeff曾被迫發明了異步API，原因是經他優化后的某個函式會在呼叫開始前回傳
- When Jeff Dean designs software, he first codes the binary and then writes the source as documentation.
當Jeff寫軟體時，他是直接碼機器碼的，寫源代碼只是為了作為檔案使用，
- Jeff Dean wrote an O(n^2) algorithm once. It was for the Traveling Salesman Problem.
Jeff曾無奈寫過一次O(n^2)的演算法，其解決的問題是旅行商問題，（該問題是NPC的，即計算機中最復雜最難解決的一類問題，許多人相信這些問題是沒有多項式時間復雜度的解的）
- Jeff Dean can beat you at connect four. In three moves.
Jeff在四子連珠的游戲中能贏你，在三步內
- When your code has undefined behavior, you get a seg fault and corrupted data. When Jeff Dean's code has undefined behavior, a unicorn rides in on a rainbow and gives everybody free ice cream.
當你的代碼有不確定行為時，你通常得到一個段錯誤或者不正確的資料，當Jeff的代碼有不確定行為時，孫悟慷訓駕著七彩云朵給每個人發免費的長壽仙桃
- When Jeff Dean fires up the profiler, loops unroll themselves in fear.
當Jeff觸發程式的程式性能采樣時，回圈會因害怕而自動展開，
- Jeff Dean is still waiting for mathematicians to discover the joke he hid in the digits of PI.
Jeff依然孤獨地等待著數學家們解開他在PI的數字中隱藏的笑話
- Jeff Dean's keyboard has two keys: 1 and 0.
Jeff的鍵盤多達兩個鍵：1和0
- When Jeff has trouble sleeping, he Mapreduces sheep.
當Jeff失眠時，他Mapreduce羊群，（Mapreduce是Jeff的作品之一，這個分布式處理的框架演算法是Google立足的根本之一）
- When Jeff Dean listens to mp3s, he just cats them to /dev/dsp and does the decoding in his head.
當Jeff聽MP3時，他查看其中的二進制內容然后在他腦子里進行音頻解碼，
- When Graham Bell invented the telephone, he saw a missed call from Jeff Dean.
當貝爺在沙漠中逮到一個手機時，他發現手機里有個Jeff的未接來電，
當貝爾發明電話后，他發現電話里有個Jeff的未接來電，
- Jeff Dean's watch displays seconds since January 1st, 1970. He is never late.
Jeff的手表顯示的數字是自1970年1月1日0點0分0秒以來的秒數，他因此從來不遲到，
- Jeff starts his programming sessions with 'cat > /dev/mem'.
Jeff在開始編程之前，會做'cat > /dev/mem'，（即把輸入的內容直接導到記憶體中）
- One day Jeff Dean grabbed his Etch-a-Sketch instead of his laptop on his way out the door. On his way back home to get his real laptop, he programmed the Etch-a-Sketch to play Tetris.
有一次Jeff出門時錯將草圖畫板當筆記本拿了，
結果在他回家取筆記本的路上，他對畫板進行了重編程以在其上玩俄羅斯方塊
- Google search went down for a few hours in 2002, and Jeff Dean started handling queries by hand. Search Quality doubled.
在2002年，Google搜索曾掛了幾個小時，于是Jeff站出來手動處理用戶的查詢請求，搜索準確度翻了番
- The x86-64 spec includes several undocumented instructions marked 'private use'. They are actually for Jeff Dean's use.
x86-64指令集中有一些沒有被記入到檔案的‘私用’指令，事實上，他們是給Jeff用的
27.mantri@mantri-laptop~$ rm -r /
rm: cannot remove root directory ‘/’mantri@mantri-laptop~$ su - jeffdean -c "rm -r /"
I am extremely sorry. Removing root directory..
不解釋
- Jeff Dean once shifted a bit so hard, it ended up on another computer.
有次Jeff移位移得太恨了，結果那一位跑到另一臺計算機上去了
- Jeff Dean has gone to /dev/null and come back.
Jeff從/dev/null那涅槃了，（龐統啊~）
Jeff又從/dev/null那涅槃了，（擦！）
- Jeff Dean sorts his phone contacts by their vcard's md5 checksums.
Jeff通訊錄的排序規則是按照聯系人的md5值
- Jeff Dean doesn't kill processes, he slays them.
Jeff他不殺行程，他肢解虐殺它們
- The needle in haystack found Jeff Dean
海底的針會自己找上Jeff
- All of the Google App Engine is actually hosted from Jeff Dean's Nexus S
Google App Engine的服務器實際上是Jeff的Nexus S
- Jeff Deans’s keyboard doesn’t have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Jeff Dean.
Jeff的鍵盤壓根就沒有Ctrl(控制)鍵，因為沒有什么東西能控制Jeff
- You name three pointers, Einstein, Euler, and Turing, when you de-reference them, all you get is Jeff Dean.
如果你命名三個指標分別為愛因斯坦、歐拉和圖靈，當你查看它們的指向時，你看到的都會是Jeff，
最后，關注公眾號Java技術堆疊，在后臺回復：GG規范，可以獲取一份 Google 代碼開發規范，非常齊全，
來源：www.zhihu.com/question/22081653/answer/20593104
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